Tuesday, July 26, 2011

Too many tweets too little time (in solitary)

Prosecutor: "Sir, did you or did you not counsel the victim not to run, and indeed, say just prior to the stabbing, and I quote, 'This kind of trouble is lots of fun'?
(Court room erupts in shock)
Judge: "Order! Order! I will clear this courtroom if there are any further outbursts!"
Witness: "Sob! I was so sure he was going to pop a six..."

       The Hasboro Trial of the Century continues to rivet a nation.

 "I remember when Rock was young." - Elton John
"Right back at you, Elton." - Rock

"You don't just 'jump' into the movie business. It takes years and years of being pretty." - Orlando Bloom

I'll bet Jennifer Love Hewitt sees a LOT of her career these days. Hope she can get it to go into the light.

"There's a whole swath of Twilight Films that make us wish we COULD, though. Heh Heh." - Elephants.

Give Brad 10 more years and Brangelina will FINALLY have some kick ass tits.

I suppose my Ivy eating started because of a kid I knew. Really bad influence. Now I'm eating Ivy before my feet even hit the floor in the morning.

Whenever I watch Extreme Makeover: Weight Loss Edition, I think 'There but for the grace of an inked TV deal'.

I'm not trying to 'start' anything with Cyndi Lauper, but anorexia, getting breast implants & marrying 98 year olds doesn't sound like fun to me.

I bet I spend anywhere from 3 to 4 hours a day, 5 days a week in the Jim. No, that's not a typo, he's HUGE & his intestine is like a maze! It's good clean... well, good fun.

The girl in my pinup poster keeps getting younger. This isn't going to end well for Betty White.

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